At long last, I hope to send regular E-newsletters again. May's is below.
I am available for introductory sessions and presentations to your organization. Just ask!
Terry LePage
949-400-3379
www.opendoorcommunication.org
May 2009 E-News
Communication Tip: Preparing to Express Honestly
Parenting Tip: Play Meets Many Needs
Upcoming Events: Nonviolent Communication Workshops and Classes
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Communication Tip: Preparing to Express Honestly
Do you want to say what you're really feeling but fear that your honest expression will be taken as criticism or blame? A little preparation can help you to be heard in a way that connects and invites mutual cooperation.
1. Come up with a brief observation that expresses your concern with no judgment or blame, just what happened.
2. Get in touch with your own feelings and needs, choosing one or two that you most wish to express.
3. Think of a doable request of the person that will contribute to your well-being. it can be a request for further discussion or to check out how the person is feeling about what you've said. Make sure you can take "no" for an answer.
4. Before expressing the honesty you've prepared, you may want to first mention that you're feeling anxious about having the conversation and that you're hoping for understanding and connection.
5. Finally, check your intentions. If you want connection and mutual caring, and to see the beautiful needs behind actions that don't work for you, you are ready to express your honesty.
OK, I admit that was more than a little preparation. If you are pressed for time, remember that the single most important preparation for expressing yourself honestly is the intention to connect and care.
Parenting Tip: Play Meets Many Needs
Play is not an "extra" for kids. It is an essential strategy for learning and growing. Exploring the environment through play helps young children get the sensory-motor input their brains need to grow. Play is a more effective learning tool than "teaching" for preschoolers. The give-and-take of play helps kids learn social skills. Make-believe helps children understand relationships and roles, and to process experiences and express emotions in a healthy way. Thoughtful parents can make tasks into games to meet needs for fun and cooperation. As parents and caregivers, we may feel awkward and rusty if we try to join in child's play. To learn about some of the ways parents can support play, see Playful Parenting by Lawrence Cohen. Does your older child play nothing but video games? Remember that older children still need structure through limits that only you can set. They may also need role models who know how to have fun without electronic aids.
Upcoming Events: Nonviolent Communication Workshops and Classes
In Santa Barbara: NVC Conference: A unique opportunity to experience a variety of trainers, and free! Co-sponsored by SBCC Adult Ed and Santa Barbara Regional NVC Circle and moderated by John Wiley. Trainers will include Jim and Jori Manske, Kit Miller, Barbara Larson, Doug Dolstad, Jeff Brown and Rodger Sorrow, offering a range of topics from introductory to advanced. Register online at http://ce.sbcc.edu/
In Costa Mesa: Nonviolent Communication Practice Groups A Saturday late afternoon group (4:30-6:30pm), begins May 9. A Sunday late afternoon group (4:30-6:30pm), begins May 10. Both are 8 weeks, skipping May 16-17, for the NVC Conference in Santa Barbara. Suggested gift is $100-$250, or mutually agreed trade, whatever is comfortable. Please contact Upgeya Pew: email him or call at 949-646-1011.
In Laguna Hills: Compassionate Communication, the basics of NVC led by Rodger Sorrow and Anne Walton. May 30, 9am to 4pm at Spirit of Life Community Church. Sliding scale $100-65 requested. www.communicationfromtheheart.com.
In Pasadena: Compassionate Self-Talk: using NVC in the way we talk to ourselves. May 23, 9am-5pm, at Church of Truth. Led by Rodger Sorrow and Anne Walton.Sliding scale $100-65 requested. www.communicationfromtheheart.com.
In Los Angeles: Women's Retreat for the Nonviolent Parenting Community, Saturday June 13, 9am to 3:30pm. Hosted by the Center for Nonviolent Education and Parenting. Join together with CNVEP's community of women for a day-long retreat. * A day of connection * A day to gather support * A day for a deeper exploration of the philosophy and practice of nonviolent parenting * A day for taking care of ourselves. $100 requested. See www.cnvep.org for more information.
In Seal Beach: Nonviolent Parenting, Wednesdays , 6:30-8:30pm at the Seal Beach Center for Spiritual Living, 500 Marina Drive. CNVEP Certified parent educators Tova Pusl and Julia Bongard. Contact them at (562) 422-8623, nvparenting@yahoo.com. Quality, loving child care provided for a family fee of $5 a night. Course cost is $180 for all ten weeks or $20 a session. (add an additional co-parent for half price.)
In Long Beach: Everyday Peacemaking. A 6-week learn/practice group for Nonviolent Communication skills and principles, led by Terry LePage. Thursdays 7-9 pm, starts Sept. 24. $50, scholarships available. At the Unitarian Universalist Church in Long Beach. Call 949-400-3379 or email Terry for registration information.
Hating people is like burning down your own house to get rid of a rat.
-Harry Emerson Fosdick
Terry LePage
Open Door Communication
terry@opendoorcommunication.org
www.OpenDoorCommunication.org
949-400-3379
Mission of Open Door Communication
To share Nonviolent Communication (NVC) and related life-serving tools with people from all walks of life in Southern California by:
Offering NVC workshops, mediation, and coaching.
Establishing practice groups and mentoring NVC resource people to multiply impact.
Facilitating supportive relationships among NVC practitioners.Click here to subscribe to Open Door E-News.
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